The Beauty Thesis

The beauty world didn't seem fun. I went from a starving student, a working professional, and now just starving.
I used to love coming home and wasting time watching people enjoy the same things I enjoyed on YouTube. Makeup, fashion, hair, dating the whole lot. Then things changed. It wasn't just money and sponsorship but a lot of information I didn't want to know but partook in.
It was tempting to get gossip from forums about social media personalities. But now it's making looking and feeling good a source of negative.
Back to just having fun, making mistakes and living.

Back to Basics

by The Beauty Thesis on 11:40 AM

The beauty world didn't seem fun. I went from a starving student, a working professional, and now just starving. I used to love comin...

Here we go again...I'm going to just post "ditto" when this happens. I don't like to blog like before...it's like being in a cult. The level of animosity, cattiness and backstabbing I see at events makes me less interested in sitting down and having fun posting photos of all the cool goodies.
Not only that, I'm really struggling with being in the beauty field now that I'm a bona fide adult. I will always enjoy primping, and looking at magazines for inspiration but when I look at social interest I feel vain, egotistical and .... UGLY!
I never knew I was unattractive until I saw all these beautiful women who were giving advice on how to be confident, how to look good when you're sick, how to pose for pictures and I don't feel comfortable posting on Instagram because I don't use all the filters so I see every single flaw. Each flaw that I don't really focus on is x1000.
I like to practice different looks and techniques to do hair, nails, eyeliner, and diys, but posting them feels vain. It feels like I'm saying "Look at me aren't I pretty?" but how do you enjoy writing about beauty and share your experience if you can't get past it?
Honestly, it's hard to feel good when your world is falling apart. I guess I just have to force myself to do it anyway, so hopefully, you will join me on this journey of getting out of our comfort zone! We got this! Right?

Anybody Home?

by The Beauty Thesis on 9:11 PM

Here we go again...I'm going to just post "ditto" when this happens. I don't like to blog like before...it's like be...

Core Blimey!

I don't understand people sometimes. The struggle is real. I don't know what to do with this blog. I like beauty, fashion etc. but my life has been about deeper issues later so I've been confused. I'm sort of scared to let go, but I am not into the "beauty culture" as its gotten so shady that it's not fun. It's a business to blog/vlog, so I feel like a twat. I enjoy writing, I really want to write so many stories, but this was just where I could document things I enjoy. I go through products like mad, and I wanted to be able to chart the progress of how my "X" reacted to product "Y" when I moved on. For example, I have forgotten that I bought something, stashed it away, and then repurchased it. I've also tossed out things like most of my As I Am products, but then I'll read reviews and think maybe I got a bad batch, and buy it again, but if I get the same result, then my hair, skin or whatever, doesn't like said product.
Now, the things happening in my life are so intense, that makeup is rare for me to experiment with. If it's not for a job, it's not happening for me. I'm not going out, I don't wear it to work, and I'm tired of putting it on others and talking about it. I guess I'm coasting and need to get in the fast lane.
Now that I peek out and see what's up, it's all about the "show reel" and not keeping it real. I love looking at things on Instagram, but I wonder about people who feel the need to always take their picture. There's a woman who posts several photos of herself a day and people in her comments are fawning over her and admiring her life, but if her life is so great, why is she online and not living it? Same with the videos, no one wants to make videos to help others, it's all about numbers, sponsors, adverts, etc. and it's made people disgusted. The link in the description will be a novel with lists of codes and links to products under the guise of providing a link so you don't have to search for yourself.
It's so bad that if you post a link or mention a product, your guilty until proven innocent of having something sinister in your post. Well, unless you're me because I don't sit with them. I'm not about that life, I'm just musing over here not making a dime, or giving a uh-huh.
What is the point? Keeping up with the current custom would have me broke, depressed and competing with a facade. Trust me, if someone's life seems so great online, then they most likely aren't enjoying themselves offline. I don't blame them, it's an ego boost having people want to be you, but when the clothes, shoes, makeup, hair come off, you will find one vulnerable insecure person because the person the internet loves is not who they are when they're in their own skin.

#xo